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Shaking hands

Discussion in 'General Forum' started by CoolDoo6, Sep 23, 2006.

  1. CoolDoo6

    CoolDoo6 Regular Member

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    I have been trying a club for a couple of months. The club was dominated by memberships of orientals who were either BBC's or those who had been in the country for a long while, as they communicated mostly in English.

    The club did not mix very well and generally the majority of the members were very reluctant to play with anyone new. Even within the existing membership, those who see themselve as good players would do their utmost to stay only within their little group and refuse to play with anyone else, to the point that they would walk off the court if anyone they perceived as not in their league try to get a game with them.

    Irrespective of the apparent shyness, reservation, and a bit of elitism, what I found especially disconcerting was that a lot of them seemed to shy away from hand shaking after a game. I am an oriental myself and have no trouble shaking people's hands, having a smile, joke, or laugh with them whether I enjoyed a game with them or not, and whether they are complete strangers or my best friends.

    As I don't normally work and play in exclusively oriental environments, I am a little puzzled. I vaguely know that we orientals are a reserved people and the idea of touching is quite personal. But I am still very curious of the correct protocol for touching in the context of sports for orientals. What are your views and experiences ?

    Rightly or wrongly, I concluded the club wasn't very friendly, and I will not go there any more.
     
  2. Tweak

    Tweak Regular Member

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    Maybe it's just bad luck? Some people I know are like that. But at the club that I play at, it's rude to NOT shake hands after a game and give a friendly comment or two.
     
  3. tkteo

    tkteo Regular Member

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    I'm Chinese, personality-wise I am more introverted so I take a while to warm up to people. But if others are just going to display an attitude to the extent of walking off the court not to play those they deem lousy, then it's just plain rude.

    Myself, if I don't enjoy interacting with the other players, I will not want to play after a while because it's just tense and not enjoyable at all.
     
  4. Super~ME!

    Super~ME! Regular Member

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    i personally have never met someone like this. it seems that even when a person i play is a real sore loser....they still come up and shake hands while displaying their unwillingness. i think it might have to do with the fact that if people are watching...it looks funny if you don'y shake hands. but if they don't shake hands...it really depends on the situation...and relationship. i would find that a stranger who didn't come up and shake hands strange since it seems so built into badminton while i wouldn't mind a friend just walk off after a game despite winning or loosing.
    i remember having a PE teacher in high school. when she was teaching badminton...she made everyone shake hands after a game and made it seem as if it were a fundamental part of the game whereas there would be no hand-shaking in any other sport such as soccer or basketball. i don't think that a hand shake is a must after a game. you can display the fact that you had a good time simply by making a compliment or polite comment on the game or even by body language and smiling. so....i don't think it matters if you shake hands or not...it's what you do instead that makes the difference.
     
  5. david14700

    david14700 Regular Member

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    I wouldn't think too much about it.

    A very simple reason may be that they know each other well and don't shake hands after every game because of habit.

    It depends on the nature of the club. Let me explain:

    If I play with 3 close friends playing on one court for 3 hours, I would certainly not expect them to shake hands after each game. We just finish one game and go straight into the next, usually with a comment such as "You lucky gits!"

    When I play at a large club and maybe have to sit out and wait for a game and play with four randomly chosen members, then it's nice to say "Good game, well played, etc." after the game and shake hands at the net, as I'm not going to play with the exact same group again.

    Maybe your club has members who have known each other for a long time and don't feel the need to be more formal after a game.
     
  6. LazyBuddy

    LazyBuddy Regular Member

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    Shaking hands is just one of the many ways to display the friendliness. Personally, I don't really care whether ppl do shake hands or not, as long as they are friendly and make others (especially new comers) comfortable. Games are of course important, but I do believe social is also a key factor for most of sport clubs.

    If I pick a club, the 1st thing I am looking for is, whether I feel happy after a session. If not, regardless how competitive the games might be, it will not be on my visiting list.
     
  7. CoolDoo6

    CoolDoo6 Regular Member

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    In a way I can understand very close friends needn't shake hands, in the same way that you don't go around shaking your family members hands. To not shake a new comer's hand just come across as very unfriedly to me. I can think of nothing more discouteous than someone turning their back and walking off the court after a game.

    For me, the closer the friend, the more I like to shake their hands and tell them how they will die in the next game.
     
    #7 CoolDoo6, Sep 26, 2006
    Last edited: Sep 26, 2006
  8. V1lau

    V1lau Regular Member

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    By the way this has nothing to do with them being "oriental", you just have rude players pure and simple. I play with close friends, strangers, enemies, but after every game there is a hand-shake. I can't believe people like this exist :(
     
  9. Jinryu

    Jinryu Regular Member

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    Politeness I find has a lot to do with formalities... it's specifically because someone goes out of their way to do something 'pointless' (like shaking hands) that you feel that your opponent or partner appreciates you for playing with them.

    At my own club I stress that people shake hands-- it doesn't matter if people 'don't care' about it, it's simply a question of doing that minimal exertion as a show of sportsmanship. Badminton is such a 'long range sport', this may be the closest that people ever get to eachother sometimes.
     
  10. Alaric

    Alaric Regular Member

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    I regularly play at a club where after every game all the players shake hand, and recently one of my friends from this club and I started to going to a different club on another night.

    The level of play at the new club is much more social and they never shake hands, however because my friend and I alway do it we just naturally started to shake everyone's hand at the end of the match. It's now caught on with the other players and happens all the time. :)

    I think it's great because it immediately creates a much friendlier amosphere, especially for any new member. :)

    Whether you play badminton casually or seriously, it should still be fun and friendly.
     
  11. bchaiyow

    bchaiyow Regular Member

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    shake hand = sportsmanship.

    Look at the WC2006 finals btwn china and england. At the end, clark was waiting at net to shake hands while fu took off to celebrate, and fu noticed this and ran to net to shake clark's hand...it's the polite and sportsmanship thing to do.

    bchaiyow
     
  12. Timbuctoo

    Timbuctoo Regular Member

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    We just give each other a high 5 after the game, less personal than shaking hands and it seems to make everyone happy. If you're gonna leave the club make sure you let them know how you feel about what is going on so that hopefully future newbys will get treated differently. I know that it is up to those that are developing the young players to teach them not just about how to play well but also correct sports ethics!!
     
  13. CoolDoo6

    CoolDoo6 Regular Member

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    High fives are no less effective than handshakes. Though it confuses some who are used to handshakes only.

    As long as there is some kind of contact, that forces people to be friendly. Without exception, in all the badminton clubs/gatherings, casual or serious, that I have come across, the ones with people who are willing to shake on it are always better places to be in, and they are in the vast majority.

    I have decided not to go back to that club even though I have paid up for a couple more weeks. The problem is no longer mine.
     
    #13 CoolDoo6, Sep 26, 2006
    Last edited: Sep 26, 2006
  14. evolution-Fung

    evolution-Fung Regular Member

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    man i trip out when they dont shake hands and just walk off the court im like wtf. not playing wiht u again lol.
     
  15. Timbuctoo

    Timbuctoo Regular Member

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    High fives are better for those who would rather less contact. How sensitive are people these days, unbelievable, lol.
     
  16. fifteen luv

    fifteen luv Regular Member

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    I do not shake hands with my partner or opponent, but after each game I will say "Thank you' to my opponent and my partner no matter whether I win or lose.
     
  17. asiaexpat

    asiaexpat Regular Member

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    I've never seen anyone shake hands after a game--we usually play among the same company group but occasionally mix it up with other company employees--a thank you after the game is the most ive seen.

    This is Thailand--among thais
     
  18. DivingBirdie

    DivingBirdie Regular Member

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    usually for me it's not a long shake but just a short hold on the hand? i don't know what i call that..maybe some kind of a hi 5
     
  19. Alaric

    Alaric Regular Member

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    I think that kind of short hand shake is quite common, but usually that's all you need. :)

    It's just friendly, polite and a sign of good sportsmanship.
     
  20. CoolDoo6

    CoolDoo6 Regular Member

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    It doesn't matter how long, as long as you make contact, people will have to be more friendly. Being friendly is the most important part of the shake.

    Sometimes after a very intense game, I don't have the energy to walk straight, never mind about shaking hands over the net. So i grab at people's hands. Sometimes I get their thumbs, and sometimes I get some of their fingers. It really doesn't matter what I ended up with. In all cases, people would smile back and say it was a good game.
     

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