Chuck Norris and badminton

Discussion in 'General Forum' started by Tomus, Nov 11, 2012.

  1. Tomus

    Tomus Regular Member

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    I wrote a little article this week about CN and badminton (http://www.badmintonweb.cz/chuck_norris_a_badminton.htm) It seems a lot of people is having fun, so I want to share also with the BadmintonCentral community. Here you go ;-)



    - Chuck Norris has managed to beat Lin Dan. Both of them played left-handed...

    - Chuck Norris can play in two corners with one shot. In fact, he can play in all corners with one shot... and the winner in the middle of the court.

    - Chuck Norris had to play the olympic finals with plastic shuttle. All the feather ones have shaken off by fear.

    - When Chuck Norris hits the roof, new ball has to be played... in a new hall.

    - Chuck Norris is going to change Victor to Loser. With RLS he plans to make RIP from it.

    - Chuck Norris doesn't play with Yonex, Babolat or Head... he plays with V-2 rackets.

    - Chuck Norris can play against himself - and win.

    - Chuck Norris one did the jump smash. It was roughly the time dinosaurs became extinct.

    - Chuck Norris can play smash from lift, smash from clear, smash from drive, smash from netshot, smash from drop and, of course, smash from smash. Some people believe he did not smash from short service once, but there are no alive witnesses...

    - Chuck Norris can kill a net shot that hit the tape. With his look, only.

    - Chuck Norris never played doubles. Even though God wanted him as a partner so much!

    - Chuck Norris never plays lifts. If he did, the shuttle would end on the orbit.

    - Chuck Norris can play behind his back and under his legs... smash, of course.

    - Chuck Norris can solely win every discipline there is in badminton. Except from women's doubles... you never know, in women's doubles ;-)

    - When Chuck Norris enters the hall, nearest player loses the match. Also his opponent loses, each player on every court loses the match, all other players in the draw lose their games and the referee unsuccesfully tries to emigrate to Tadjikistan.

    - If Chuck Norris played the high service, he would kill the God.

    - Chuck Norris' smash hits the floor even before Chuck starts thinking about playing the smash...

    - Chuck Norris only knows one trickshot. He fakes the smash... and he plays the smash.

    - Chuck Norris managed to play the shuttle with a speed of 500 kmph. With his backhand short service.

    - Chuck Norris once played a match on Chixculuba Plains...

    - Chuck Norris does not GET points in the game. He just TAKES what was rightfuly his.

    - Chuck Norris doesn't need to bring a towel to the court. His opponents throw him their own...

    - Chuck Norris can break the string of his opponent's racket only by looking... at the cheerleaders.

    - Chuck Norris doesn't play net-kills. He just (plays) kills... from every corner.

    - Chuck Norris doesn't play with YONEX, he plays with YOuNEXt. His second choice would be HEADshot.

    - All other player play BADminton, Chuck Norris plays GOODminton.

    - In past Chuck Norris played against Vincent Van Gogh, Horatio Nelson, Stephen William Hawking and One-eyed Bandit.
     
  2. amleto

    amleto Regular Member

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    ****! Have I travelled back to 1999?
     
  3. firetab

    firetab Regular Member

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    Hahaha, amleto, go easy on him!

    Some of these were cute, I smirked for many of them. : )
     

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