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Thread: Jokes

  1. #409
    Regular Member ctjcad's Avatar
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    Default Some Police Car Around The World!!

    ..for you sports-car enthusiasts out there...
    1. Italian police car...Lamborghini..gallardo..max speed 320km/hr
    2. Japan..Nissan Skyline GTR ..max speed 280km/hr
    3. France ...Peugeot...sports gt
    4. Spain .Audi TT max speed 280km/hr
    5. England .Corvette Z06...... Incredible ...
    and last but not least...
    6. INDONESIA... Sporty Toyota Kijang Jantan Pick-up Ute 1984 Model... Max Speed 55km/hr
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    Last edited by ctjcad; 09-15-2006 at 01:32 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by ctjcad
    ..for you sports-car enthusiasts out there...
    1. Italian police car...Lamborghini..gallardo..max speed 320km/hr
    2. Japan..Nissan Skyline GTR ..max speed 280km/hr
    3. France ...Peugeot...sports gt
    4. Spain .Audi TT max speed 280km/hr
    5. England .Corvette Z06...... Incredible ...
    and last but not least...
    6. INDONESIA... Sporty Toyota Kijang Jantan Pick-up Ute 1984 Model... Max Speed 55km/hr
    My next dream job - Italian policeman.

    I'm surprised English police use American cars. I expected they may use a Lotus, Jaguar or Rolls Royce.

  3. #411
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    Quote Originally Posted by Qidong
    My next dream job - Italian policeman.

    I'm surprised English police use American cars. I expected they may use a Lotus, Jaguar or Rolls Royce.
    british is smarter.
    corvette is best bang for the buck.
    http://www.top100musclecarsites.com/...-Corvette.html
    http://www.rsportscars.com/eng/cars/corvette_z06.asp
    http://thx2.net/2006-Z06.htm

    where can u find a new car, 0-60 under 5 sec, meet calif. emission and does not incur federal government gas-guzzler penalty, for under 45k retail?? The 505hp version of Z06 cost 72k retail tho, 64k invoice. 0-60 in ~3.6 sec, and yes, this one too meet above gov't criteria. Can easily beat all police cars shown in above post. I forgot, top speed is 318 km/hr, still slower than fu's jumpsmash tho This is just the consumer verison, i'm sure the police version can be tweaked a bit more.
    Last edited by cooler; 09-15-2006 at 09:24 PM.

  4. #412
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    Quote Originally Posted by Qidong
    My next dream job - Italian policeman.

    I'm surprised English police use American cars. I expected they may use a Lotus, Jaguar or Rolls Royce.
    Lol... that is definitely Not an English police car... first of all, our emergency service number is 999 not 911. Also you're right, there are Lotus police cars:



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    Quote Originally Posted by fast3r
    Lol... that is definitely Not an English police car... first of all, our emergency service number is 999 not 911. Also you're right, there are Lotus police cars:


    LOL, the cop chase down a .... speeding bicycler

  6. #414
    Regular Member ctjcad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fast3r
    Lol... that is definitely Not an English police car... first of all, our emergency service number is 999 not 911.
    ..that's right & after checking it's actually a Michigan, U.S. police car... actually, here's the link to the city's police dept.'s car...
    http://www.geocities.com/MotorCity/F...433/bloom.html
    whoow-niiiice..

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    Default Teacher Arrested

    NEW YORK -- A public school teacher was arrested today at John F.
    Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while
    in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule and
    a calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General Alberto
    Gonzales said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra
    movement.
    >
    He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with
    carrying weapons of math instruction. "Al-gebra is a problem for us,"
    Gonzales said. "They desire solutions by means and extremes, and
    sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values. They use
    secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as
    'unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common denominator
    of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country.
    >
    As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "There are 3 sides to
    every triangle."
    >
    When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had
    wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have
    given us more fingers and toes."
    >
    White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more
    intelligent or profound statement by the President.

  8. #416
    Regular Member ctjcad's Avatar
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    Smile George Bush's email..

    ..Just for fun guys, nothing to be serious...BTW, i like the last one by Kofi Annan..
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    Default Popular Joke Going Around Thailand

    Thaksin was walking out of United Nations building just shortly after he received news that he had been overthrown, when a New Yorker stopped him
    to ask: "Sir are you a Thai?"
    The policeman turned tycoon turned politician replied: "No sir, i am Fin-nish."

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    line judging javalin can be dangerous.
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    Quote Originally Posted by cooler
    line judging javalin can be dangerous.
    Is this true????Err,pity them who like this sport..

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    wow it really dangerous...

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    She's lucky it didn't land a few inches further.

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    That's not a joke at all. Isn't our BF resident Dr. Cheung a trauma specialist or something and used to work in the emergency ward?

  15. #423
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pete LSD
    That's not a joke at all. Isn't our BF resident Dr. Cheung a trauma specialist or something and used to work in the emergency ward?
    i don't know what thread to put it in

  16. #424
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    It will be a much more dangerous job for high school or lower level. Once I tried it in our annual high school track and field competition, there were some students never did it before and the Javalin ended up flying everywhere.

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    Default Lassie vs

    These are really funny Lassie vs <insert powerful super villian here>

    Lassie vs Jigsaw (mastermind in horror movie Saw)
    http://filmforce.ign.com/articles/728/728778p1.html
    Lassie vs Venom (Spiderman's arch enemy)
    http://filmforce.ign.com/articles/729/729102p1.html
    Lassie vs Borat (Mock Kazakstani reporter)
    http://filmforce.ign.com/articles/729/729545p1.html
    Lassie vs Lord Voldemort (Villian spellcaster from Harry Potter)
    http://filmforce.ign.com/articles/729/729573p1.html
    Lassie vs Megatron (The final battle!)
    http://filmforce.ign.com/articles/730/730174p1.html

    This is what I do at work.

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