Jokes

**ctjcad** · 09-15-2006, 12:28 PM

..for you sports-car enthusiasts out there...
1. Italian police car...Lamborghini..gallardo..max speed 320km/hr
2. Japan..Nissan Skyline GTR ..max speed 280km/hr
3. France ...Peugeot...sports gt
4. Spain .Audi TT max speed 280km/hr
5. England .Corvette Z06...... Incredible ...
and last but not least...
6. INDONESIA... Sporty Toyota Kijang Jantan Pick-up Ute 1984 Model... Max Speed 55km/hr

**Qidong** · 09-15-2006, 06:44 PM

Originally Posted by ctjcad

..for you sports-car enthusiasts out there...
1. Italian police car...Lamborghini..gallardo..max speed 320km/hr
2. Japan..Nissan Skyline GTR ..max speed 280km/hr
3. France ...Peugeot...sports gt
4. Spain .Audi TT max speed 280km/hr
5. England .Corvette Z06...... Incredible ...
and last but not least...
6. INDONESIA... Sporty Toyota Kijang Jantan Pick-up Ute 1984 Model... Max Speed 55km/hr

My next dream job - Italian policeman.

I'm surprised English police use American cars. I expected they may use a Lotus, Jaguar or Rolls Royce.

**cooler** · 09-15-2006, 08:10 PM

Originally Posted by Qidong

My next dream job - Italian policeman.

I'm surprised English police use American cars. I expected they may use a Lotus, Jaguar or Rolls Royce.

british is smarter.
corvette is best bang for the buck.
http://www.top100musclecarsites.com/...-Corvette.html
http://www.rsportscars.com/eng/cars/corvette_z06.asp
http://thx2.net/2006-Z06.htm

where can u find a new car, 0-60 under 5 sec, meet calif. emission and does not incur federal government gas-guzzler penalty, for under 45k retail?? The 505hp version of Z06 cost 72k retail tho, 64k invoice. 0-60 in ~3.6 sec, and yes, this one too meet above gov't criteria. Can easily beat all police cars shown in above post. I forgot, top speed is 318 km/hr, still slower than fu's jumpsmash tho

This is just the consumer verison, i'm sure the police version can be tweaked a bit more.

**fast3r** · 09-16-2006, 03:41 PM

Originally Posted by Qidong

My next dream job - Italian policeman.

I'm surprised English police use American cars. I expected they may use a Lotus, Jaguar or Rolls Royce.

Lol... that is definitely Not an English police car... first of all, our emergency service number is 999 not 911. Also you're right, there are Lotus police cars:

**cooler** · 09-16-2006, 04:07 PM

Originally Posted by fast3r

Lol... that is definitely Not an English police car... first of all, our emergency service number is 999 not 911. Also you're right, there are Lotus police cars:

LOL, the cop chase down a .... speeding bicycler

**ctjcad** · 09-16-2006, 04:29 PM

Originally Posted by fast3r

Lol... that is definitely Not an English police car... first of all, our emergency service number is 999 not 911.

..that's right & after checking it's actually a Michigan, U.S. police car...

actually, here's the link to the city's police dept.'s car...
http://www.geocities.com/MotorCity/F...433/bloom.html
whoow-niiiice..

**cooler** · 09-18-2006, 12:33 PM

NEW YORK -- A public school teacher was arrested today at John F.
Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while
in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule and
a calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General Alberto
Gonzales said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra
movement.
>
He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with
carrying weapons of math instruction. "Al-gebra is a problem for us,"
Gonzales said. "They desire solutions by means and extremes, and
sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values. They use
secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as
'unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common denominator
of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country.
>
As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "There are 3 sides to
every triangle."
>
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had
wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have
given us more fingers and toes."
>
White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more
intelligent or profound statement by the President.

**ctjcad** · 09-24-2006, 11:27 AM

..Just for fun guys, nothing to be serious...BTW, i like the last one by Kofi Annan..

**khwong** · 09-24-2006, 12:08 PM

Thaksin was walking out of United Nations building just shortly after he received news that he had been overthrown, when a New Yorker stopped him
to ask: "Sir are you a Thai?"
The policeman turned tycoon turned politician replied: "No sir, i am Fin-nish."

**cooler** · 09-25-2006, 11:24 PM

line judging javalin can be dangerous.

**riz-nie** · 09-26-2006, 07:49 AM

Originally Posted by cooler

line judging javalin can be dangerous.

Is this true????Err,pity them who like this sport..

**arice_MAS** · 09-26-2006, 09:47 AM

wow it really dangerous...

**slvrdrgn123** · 09-26-2006, 06:32 PM

She's lucky it didn't land a few inches further.

**Pete LSD** · 09-26-2006, 06:40 PM

That's not a joke at all. Isn't our BF resident Dr. Cheung a trauma specialist or something

and used to work in the emergency ward?

**cooler** · 09-26-2006, 07:46 PM

Originally Posted by Pete LSD

That's not a joke at all. Isn't our BF resident Dr. Cheung a trauma specialist or something

and used to work in the emergency ward?

i don't know what thread to put it in

**Qidong** · 09-26-2006, 10:38 PM

It will be a much more dangerous job for high school or lower level. Once I tried it in our annual high school track and field competition, there were some students never did it before and the Javalin ended up flying everywhere.