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Thread: Jokes

  1. #1055
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    Quote Originally Posted by Oldhand View Post
    I'd also be interested in finding out if there are camels, elephants and rhinos freely roaming North Vancouver
    Given the amount of pot that Vancouverites are reported to smoke, they are bound to 'see' anything crossing the road.

  2. #1056
    Regular Member ctjcad's Avatar
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    Default Newfoundland police chase..

    ..(some of you have seen this; if not, enjoy!) NOW, this is what i call a Police chase!!!..

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wj_g-kYAZxw

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    Quote Originally Posted by ctjcad View Post
    ..(some of you have seen this; if not, enjoy!) NOW, this is what i call a Police chase!!!..

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wj_g-kYAZxw
    That clip's featured on a TV ad. Not sure what it's for... probably snow tires

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    Quote Originally Posted by ctjcad View Post
    ..(some of you have seen this; if not, enjoy!) NOW, this is what i call a Police chase!!!..

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wj_g-kYAZxw
    car/truck is your friend in canadian winter, it keeps u warm while the engine is running. Yes, we like running a 5 liter engine to power our heater We worry about local warming first before worrying about global warming

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    Quote Originally Posted by Oldhand View Post
    I'd also be interested in finding out if there are camels, elephants and rhinos freely roaming North Vancouver
    Well, the size of some of the obese residents there do resemble those of camels, rhinos and elephants.

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  7. #1061
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    Default Executive Decision...

    ..(some of you have probably read this; if not, enjoy!)

    Fellow Business Executives:

    As the CFO of this business that employs 140 people, I have resigned
    myself to the fact that Barack Obama will be our next President, and
    that our taxes and government fees will increase in a BIG way.

    To compensate for these increases, I figure that the Clients will have
    to see an increase in our fees to them of about 8%. But since we cannot
    increase our fees right now due to the dismal state of our economy, we
    will have to lay off six of our employees instead. This has really been
    eating at me for a while, as we believe we are a family here and I didn't
    know how to choose who will have to go.

    So, this is what I did. I strolled thru our parking lot and found 8
    Obama bumper stickers on our employees' cars and have decided these
    folks will be the first to be laid off. I can't think of a more fair way
    to approach this problem. These folks wanted change; I gave it to them!

    If you have a better idea, let me know.

    Sincerely,

  8. #1062
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    Sounds like you are 1 of the top 5% rich people, upset that Obama won. Please no political jokes or discussion. As one of the middle classes, I don't feel that funny.
    Last edited by Qidong; 11-19-2008 at 04:50 PM.

  9. #1063
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    Default ^^I am even game...^^

    ..fair game...If need proof, ask our cooler if i have posted jokes about Prez Bush/Republican party.....Btw, why no complaints when Bush jokes are abound????? ...
    Last edited by ctjcad; 11-19-2008 at 05:00 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by ctjcad View Post
    ..fair game...If need proof, ask our cooler if i have posted jokes about Prez Bush/Republican party.....Btw, why no complaints when Bush jokes are abound????? ...
    do what i say and not what i do

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    Quote Originally Posted by ctjcad View Post
    ..fair game...If need proof, ask our cooler if i have posted jokes about Prez Bush/Republican party.....Btw, why no complaints when Bush jokes are abound????? ...
    Well, if Bush has an approval rating of 20%, he won't get any support from either parties. Sure not many people will complain about his jokes. But my advise is that these kinds of political jokes especially the one you posted earlier - diff between Bin Ladin and Obama is bs, no matter it's against McClain or Obama, their supporters will feel offended.

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    Default ^^Aahh, well...^^

    ...*sigh* cooler, i guess we're probably the only ones left with some sort of a sense of humor (heck, maybe the Bush/Republican supporters, too)....I hope you are still keeping those Bush jokes, cos we'll need to put those up again; with things going now, it looks like it'll be a long, loooong jokes-free 4 yrs with the new prez...I guess Prez Bush will graciously end his term with a 20% approval rating and will humbly take with him all the jokes (good, bad, mean-spirited etc.) that have been poured on him the last 8 yrs....

    *Qidong, i apologize if the jokes i've posted recently have offended or bothered you in any way. I never intended to focus on any particular prez/candidates as i've pretty much been even-keeled and fair game in terms of putting out political jokes. After all, most jokes/parodies/humors do have some truth in them, albeit they are made in jest or light-hearted way....And btw, your assumption of me being one of the top 5% of the rich people, ehm, i wish, my friend. I would say i am on the opposite 5% end of the spectrum...

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    Default Humourless Obama

    Why is it that so many think that now that Bush is out and Obama is in, that there will be nothing to make fun of?
    Obama may come across as earnest and serious, but by golly if he's human, then he is fallible. And were there's human failure there is comedy.

    Every wily politico knows that in a campaign you can fool enough of the people for enough of a time. But once in power you can please none of the people none of the time.

    PS why is everyone writing in microscript all of a sudden? I gonna need bifocals!

  14. #1068
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    Default During their meeting..

    ..


    During this brief exchange, President Bush whispered to President-elect Obama:.

    Bush : Barack, I’ve got 2 things to tell ya!

    Obama : Yes, Mr. President, tell me!

    Bush : 8 yrs ago, I remember, I was standing right in your spot and waving to the crowd just like you did..

    Obama : Yes, I can see that..

    Bush : And I’ve got to tell ya another thing..

    Obama : Yes, Mr. President..
    (Bush exhaled a long sigh)..
    Bush : In 4 or 8 more yrs, if you get re-elected, you’ll be standing right in my spot…

    Obama : ……….





    ..then soon after as they were inside the White House, President Bush turned to Obama and asked him, while pointing to the pictures above:

    Bush: “How come I didn’t receive the same warm & support, when I won the election 8 yrs ago, like you did?..

    (a long silence ensues)..

    Obama : Because…………………......I’m cuter than you…



    *Bush/Republican supporters in Riot mode*

  15. #1069
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    Default We're moving to Washington DC, USA!!...

    Obama is the new U.S. President! We're moving to Washington DC...



    *Fidget, to save space..
    Last edited by ctjcad; 11-20-2008 at 07:26 PM.

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    Bush: “How come I didn’t receive the same warm & support, when I won the election 8 yrs ago, like you did?..

    (a long silence ensues)..

    Obama : Because…………………......You didn't stand on the right spot like i have

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    i heard NY is better
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