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Thread: Jokes

  1. #1378
    Regular Member pBmMalaysia's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by extremenanopowe View Post
    I had lunch with 2 of my unmarried friends. One is engaged, one is a mistress, and I have been married for 20+ years. We were chatting about our relationships and decided to amaze our men by greeting them at the door wearing a black bra, stiletto heels and a mask over our eyes.
    We agreed to meet in a few days to exchange notes..

    Here's how it all went.

    My Engaged Friend:

    The other night when my boyfriend came over he found me with a black leather bodice, tall stilettos and a mask.
    He saw me and said, 'You are the woman of my dreams.
    I love you.' Then we made passionate love all nightlong.

    The Mistress:

    Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and I was wearing a raincoat, under it only the black bra, heels and mask over my eyes.
    When I opened the raincoat he didn't say a word, but he started to tremble and we had wild *** all night.

    My Story:

    When my husband came home I was wearing the black bra, black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes. When he came in the door and saw me he said, "What's for dinner,Batman?"
    that's a good one but

    the biggest joke here is

    are you yourself a woman?

  2. #1379
    Regular Member ctjcad's Avatar
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    Default Train can't wait..

    ..(some of you have probably seen this; if not, then can smile)..

    If you have a choice, which one would you choose : Allah or the train?..

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kESYgrY50PE


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    Regular Member extremenanopowe's Avatar
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    ok man. Time for everyone to contribute. It is good to relax at times. Just to show that you have a bit of sense of humour.

    This is a good one....


    In an alcohol factory the regular taster died and the director
    started looking for a new one to hire.

    A drunkard with ragged, dirty look came to apply for the position.

    The director of the factory wondered how to send him away.

    They tested him.

    They gave him a glass with a drink.
    He tried it and said,
    "It’s red wine, a muscat, three years old, grown on a north slope, matured in steel containers."
    "That’s correct", said the boss.

    Another glass.
    "It’s red wine, Cabernet, eight years old, a southwestern slope, oak barrels."
    "Correct."

    The director was astonished.
    He winked at his secretary to suggest something.

    She brought in a glass of urine. The alcoholic tried it.

    "It’s a blond, 26 years old, pregnant in the third month.
    And if you don’t give me the job, I’ll also tell who’s the father!"

  4. #1381
    Regular Member wilfredlgf's Avatar
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    Still Neverton.

    STILL beneath us.

  5. #1382
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    Quote Originally Posted by extremenanopowe View Post
    I had lunch with 2 of my unmarried friends. One is engaged, one is a mistress, and I have been married for 20+ years. We were chatting about our relationships and decided to amaze our men by greeting them at the door wearing a black bra, stiletto heels and a mask over our eyes.
    We agreed to meet in a few days to exchange notes..

    Here's how it all went.

    My Engaged Friend:

    The other night when my boyfriend came over he found me with a black leather bodice, tall stilettos and a mask.
    He saw me and said, 'You are the woman of my dreams.
    I love you.' Then we made passionate love all nightlong.

    The Mistress:

    Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and I was wearing a raincoat, under it only the black bra, heels and mask over my eyes.
    When I opened the raincoat he didn't say a word, but he started to tremble and we had wild *** all night.

    My Story:

    When my husband came home I was wearing the black bra, black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes. When he came in the door and saw me he said, "What's for dinner,Batman?"
    If the story is changed to ".... I have been married for 7 years....", the same thing will happen.

  6. #1383
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    Quote Originally Posted by extremenanopowe View Post
    I had lunch with 2 of my unmarried friends. One is engaged, one is a mistress, and I have been married for 20+ years. We were chatting about our relationships and decided to amaze our men by greeting them at the door wearing a black bra, stiletto heels and a mask over our eyes.
    We agreed to meet in a few days to exchange notes..

    Here's how it all went.

    My Engaged Friend:

    The other night when my boyfriend came over he found me with a black leather bodice, tall stilettos and a mask.
    He saw me and said, 'You are the woman of my dreams.
    I love you.' Then we made passionate love all nightlong.

    The Mistress:

    Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and I was wearing a raincoat, under it only the black bra, heels and mask over my eyes.
    When I opened the raincoat he didn't say a word, but he started to tremble and we had wild *** all night.

    My Story:

    When my husband came home I was wearing the black bra, black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes. When he came in the door and saw me he said, "What's for dinner,Batman?"
    OK, given that the married wife got married around 20. She is married for 20+ years. She must be 40+ now. Tell me what is not sagging... That is including his dick...

  7. #1384
    Regular Member extremenanopowe's Avatar
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    I see very few bc people with humour. Most prefer to get stress and battle out in KO.

    Anyway, life is short, I got a couple of friends with high blood pressure and liver cancer. Chill out dude. Enjoy life.

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    Quote Originally Posted by extremenanopowe View Post
    I see very few bc people with humour. Most prefer to get stress and battle out in KO.

    Anyway, life is short, I got a couple of friends with high blood pressure and liver cancer. Chill out dude. Enjoy life.
    Sorry if I sound like a kill joy. I just want to point out the reason why her husband react that way. It is from experience. Beside, does she think she is a MILF?

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    Quote Originally Posted by silentheart View Post
    Tell me what is not sagging... That is including his d***...
    This thread is becoming rather lurid. Besides, "sagging" is such an unflattering description.
    Kinder on BC to say, "head-heavy and flexible".

  10. #1387
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    Saggy? LOL pls consult Wong Mew Choo... she just "upgraded" her assets... LOL

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    Quote Originally Posted by jimbo View Post
    Saggy? LOL pls consult Wong Mew Choo... she just "upgraded" her assets... LOL

    oh my.. that's really BOLEH !!

    and LCW is so pissed off thinking about it, he keeps losing to LD.... lol....

  12. #1389
    Administrator kwun's Avatar
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    this is too funny!!!


  13. #1390
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    Quote Originally Posted by kwun View Post
    this is too funny!!!

    LMAO...that is beyond epic fail.

  14. #1391
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    Somebody posted this before a couple years ago, I think. Pretty funny.

    But if you make fun of this, are you making fun of Lance Armstrong?
    This video is from the Livestrong website, after all, which is trying to get people a bit more active. Not a bad thing. Very noble, in fact.

    But perhaps there is a slight difference in the advice to:
    a) get an $8,000 bike and start grinding up your local Col de Tourmelet on weekends

    ...and...

    b) go to a windy park in your dungarees and underhand a Walmart birdie. (don't to tuck your shirt in!)

  15. #1392
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fidget View Post
    Somebody posted this before a couple years ago, I think. Pretty funny.

    But if you make fun of this, are you making fun of Lance Armstrong?
    This video is from the Livestrong website, after all, which is trying to get people a bit more active. Not a bad thing. Very noble, in fact.

    But perhaps there is a slight difference in the advice to:
    a) get an $8,000 bike and start grinding up your local Col de Tourmelet on weekends

    ...and...

    b) go to a windy park in your dungarees and underhand a Walmart birdie. (don't to tuck your shirt in!)
    A) grind your cojones against the saddle to that it is purplish and numb but since it's an 8k bike, just suck it up?

    A1) he's got one ball left to numb against the saddle!

    B) there is no B.
    Last edited by RSLvictorSOTX; 03-13-2011 at 10:28 PM.

  16. #1393
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    Default safe badminton

    Enough said. Better be safe than sorry.
    Attached Images Attached Images  

  17. #1394
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    Quote Originally Posted by !¿Clue?! View Post
    LMAO...that is beyond epic fail.
    You must be joking. Taking 2 steps before laying into the serve? ROFL

    Tsunami fail.

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