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  1. #1
    Regular Member chris-ccc's Avatar
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    Smile Some jokes during our suppertime@ccc

    Greetings,

    CCC should start our collection of jokes here before we forget.

    * ====== * ====== * ====== * ====== *

    Many players@ccc are from Malaysia... and sometimes out come some Malaysian jokes when we communicate and/or at our suppertime@ccc.

    And here is one...

    Have you seen the Made-in-Malaysia car "Kancil"? You know, that very little 600cc car?

    Well, Dr M really wanted to sell it to the US, so when Dr M paid a visit to the White House after finishing formal discussions with George Bush, Dr M checks with Bush to find out if there is a way to sell the Kancil in the USA.

    After having looked at the brochure, Bush said, "You know, I think this 'KERNCHILL' is too small for us Americans."

    Not one who gives up easily, Dr M persisted and finally Bush offered, "Ok, take this number down. This guy is my good buddy and he's also the CEO of the biggest compact car distributor in North America."

    Dr M was satisfied with the meeting and returns to Malaysia. The next day he called the number and a lady answered, "
    TOYS R US, can I help you?"


    Hehehe... but for me, I think the Kancil is a better sustainable transport.

    Cheers... chris@ccc

  2. #2
    Regular Member chris-ccc's Avatar
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    Smile Life According to Chinese

    Life According to Chinese... Why are we working so hard?

    On the very first day of the world, God created the cow.
    He said to the cow: "Ah Gu (cow), today I have created you! Your job is to go to the field with the farmer all day long. You will provide the energy to pull things! You will also provide milk for people to drink! You are to work all day under the sun! In return, you will only eat grass. For that, you will have a life span of 50 years."

    Ah Gu objected. "What... I work all day in the sun and I get only to eat grass! On top of that, I have to give my milk away! This is tough and you want me to live 50 years! I'll take 20 and you can have the remaining 30 years back!"
    God agreed.

    On the next day, God created the dog.
    He said to the dog. "Ah Kow (dog), I have created you for a purpose. You are to sit all day by the door of your master's house! Should anyone come in, you are to bark at them! In return, you will eat your master's leftovers. I'll give you a life span of 20 years."

    Ah Kow objected. "What... I have to sit by the door all day and will need to bark at people, and what do I get... LEFTOVERS... This isn't right, I'll take 10 and you can have the remaining 10 years back!"
    God agreed again.

    On the third day, God created the monkey.
    He said to the monkey. "Lao Kao (monkey), your job is to entertain people. You will make them laugh, act stupid and make faces! You will also do somersaults and swing on trees to amaze them. In return, you will get to eat bananas and peanuts. For that, I'll give you 20 years to live."

    Naturally the monkey objected. "This is ridiculous, I gotta make faces and make people laugh let not even come to the part about the trees and somersaults. Tell you what, I'll give 10 years of my life to thank you for my existence and I'll take 10. What do you think?"
    God agreed again.

    On the forth day, God created humans.
    God said to the man. "You are my best piece of work, for that, you will only need to sleep, eat, sleep, play, eat, sleep again and do nothing else. You will get to eat all the best things and play with the best toys. All you need to do is enjoy all your life. For this kinda of life, I'll give you 20 years."

    Just like the rest, the man objected. "What, all I need to do is relax and enjoy myself and I have only 20 years to live? Tell you what, you've 30 years back from Ah Gu, 10 years from Ah Kow and another 10 from Lao Kao and you probably don't know what to do with all those lifes. Why not I take them all and I'll have 70 years to live?"
    God being such good natured, agreed with a smile......

    And THAT IS WHY..... We eat, sleep, play and enjoy for the first 20 years of our lives when we are growing up. Work like a cow for the next 30 to raise our family. Sit outside the door and bark at people for the next 10 when we are retired. And finally, we make faces and perform monkey tricks to entertain our grandchildren for the final 10 years.


    Cheers... chris@ccc


  3. #3
    Regular Member chris-ccc's Avatar
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    Smile The meaning of WIFE

    Here are some short ones...

    ************

    Husband asks , "Do you know the meaning of WIFE?
    "Without Information Fighting Everytime"
    Wife replies, "No, It means... With Idiot For Ever !!!"

    ************

    Three Feelings: What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?
    Stress is when wife is pregnant.
    Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant.
    Panic is when both are pregnant.

    ************

    Teacher: you know the importance of period?
    Kid: Ya, once my sister said she has missed one, my mom fainted, dad got heart attack & our driver ran away.

    ************

    Why did they stop printing Pamela Anderson stamps in the U.S.A.?
    B'coz people started licking the wrong side.

    ************

    Women asked man who is traveling with six children, all these kids are yours???
    No, I work in a condom factory & these are customer complaints.

    ************

    Cheers... chris@ccc



  4. #4
    Regular Member chris-ccc's Avatar
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    Smile Done anything wild in your life?

    Done anything wild in your life?

    This was sent to me...

    Funny!

    I was at the mall the other day eating at the food court.

    I noticed an old man watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors... green, red, orange, and blue.


    The old man kept staring at him.

    The teenager would look and find the old man staring every time. When the teenager had enough, he sarcastically asked, "What's the matter, never done anything wild in your life?".


    The old man did not bat an eye in his response. "Got drunk once and had *** with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son."

    Cheers... chris@ccc


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