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Thread: teenager temper
07-28-2009, 02:47 AM #1
what is with teenager these days with such bad temper?
today in the gym, a father/son whom we've never seen invited us for a game. it was a simple match, nothing too closely fought, both our opponents are decent player with decent shots but perhaps lacking a bit in consistency. which is fine, usually, it is very common. but after a few points and a few mistake, the son, probably in the mid to late teens starts cursing at himself. later on after missing a few more shots, started whacking the floor with his racket.
seriously, it is just a game, every one of us have loss games before, we do it every week. we have bad days before, happens to me every day. it is just part of playing the game, enjoy and have fun.
after a few whacks, i think the kid have cracked the racket. then he kinda realized what he has done and the father had a few words with him and he calmed down on the second game.
i guess we all have gotten through that stage in life before, a bit brash while we were young, but i think kids these days seems to be worse. maybe life is just too good and comfy, with everything provided for.
07-28-2009, 03:35 AM #2
Never seen kids doing that. That kid must have watched too much Tennis.
But I have a very rich friend who whack his racquet whenever he makes silly mistake. Maybe he used to it already. My advice to parents who have tempered kid, is to let the kid knows that instead of showing bad temper on court he should show his anger by smashing harder/better, defend better and run faster.
07-28-2009, 06:36 AM #3
I saw a teenager throw his racket across the court into a wall after a game. It became apparent why he and his partner had never talked to each other throughout the game...his partner was scared of him!
Kwun is right in saying that an attitude like that likely comes from having things a little too easy. An entitled, whiny attitude is not new (think of young John McEnroe), but it is probably more common now. However I still believe that badminton players are more courteous, on average.
07-28-2009, 08:14 AM #4
In my younger days, one day I threw my racket out (lucky, landed on some mat in the corner) after a frustrating game, following a frustrating day. I think my brain was just heated up after all the "not going well" incidents. I regreted as soon as the racket left my hand, and made apology to everyone, especially to my partner.
I think everyone can be frustrated, regardless the age, kids have no exception, just us may not realize. Just like they may never understand why parents can be tired and frusted during work, while all they know (from TV or movie) working is to get big $$$ while chatting with good looking co-workers in a very nice built office.
Anyway, I am not trying to make an excuse for the kid, but just say, we did not know what had happened before they entered the game. Maybe the kid got a tough day in school? Maybe some family issues? Who knows, just got chopped by gf? Or, his ego just got hurt, after making simple mistakes?
07-28-2009, 11:49 AM #5
While it is true that I have met quite a few teenagers with temper issues, most of the problems I face at the club I go to (Bintang Campbell) are from the occasional adult.
I think that it's not just an issue with kids (although I'm sure they are more prone, there are plenty of temperamental kids I saw when I was playing high school badminton), but rather with people in general.
I'm just staking a claim that it's not exclusive to teens, hehe.
07-28-2009, 01:33 PM #6
Just want to knock on our North American kids here. Here in US, the kids are just too spoiled. They get everything they want. If not, they just throw temper around until the parents submit to their well. Just look at when Wii first came out. Parents pay $1,000 for the kids so they can play all day and get fat.
In a way, I am glad to see the father got the son under control and the best thing is he actually understood and calmed down in the second game. I think many fathers will be happy to crack a badminton racquet to give a lesson and actaully get the kid to listen.
07-28-2009, 04:01 PM #7
That's why they're called teenagers..
- Who was making the errors? the son or the father or both? maybe the son's expectation of himself is way over his head..Did he scream out all of the curse words??..
Personally, i've rarely seen such instances. Usually the ones i witnessed are adults displaying such emotional outrage, not so much to the extent of whacking and beating the racket on the mat/floor.
- Absolutely concur. It is just a game. Perhaps the teenager son hasn't gotten himself used to the idea that it's just a game, and it's not the end of his baddy playing experience.
- I hope it's a fake racket that he cracked. Good to know the son calmed down in the 2nd game.
- Yep, all of us (adults) have gone through that stage before. But as in relation to baddy, no, i totally missed playing baddy while i grew up as a teenager, so no chance for me to share. I took it out on the basketball instead.
I guess, next time, hope you'll get a chance to play against them and see if the son has changed his attitude and approach to the game.
07-28-2009, 04:47 PM #8
There was something I read that people , who smash their rackets , are getting angry because they are perfectionists . And because they are perfecting their shots , they are unleashing their temper.
It is terrible to be angry , sometimes you have a bad game/day.
When I see my opponent angry I normally capatalise on it , because I know if I win the next couple of points they will keep building their rage - and making my life easier , by just handing me the points.
( I hate it when I see people breaking expensive rackets!)
07-28-2009, 05:49 PM #9
07-28-2009, 05:58 PM #10
as for kwun's case, i came across a similar situation myself in a pubic recreation center. After playing with frens in MD, they left so i sat down to cool down, readying to pack it in. Then came a young teen, prolly in high school, 2-3 inches taller than me and want to play me. I said we need 2 more to play doubles but he wanna play MS. I said ok since i could use some practice in singles after all 2 hr of MD. What a joke, i move in around like a toy. Sure he whack it hard, if i set him up a nice one but has no consistency. He keep cursing himself, constantly swinging his racket across the net before picking up the shuttle. He also smacking his racket against his shoes and calves. He also smacking the dead shuttle onto the floor. I dunno why tho since he prolly watched me playing MD before challenging me and all this time he thot he can take me. I didnt stay around to check what kind of cellphone he has
Last edited by cooler; 07-28-2009 at 06:11 PM.
07-28-2009, 07:30 PM #11
It is the physical abuse and the destructive behaviour that are unacceptable
Some say that part of a teenager problem can be the result of;
* Having a poor diet
* Lack of sleep
* Pressure from peer groups, parents and teachers
IMHO, it is not unusual for a teenager (or an adult) to be angry or to release his/her frustration. It is the physical abuse and the destructive behaviour that are unacceptable.
07-28-2009, 07:57 PM #12
07-28-2009, 08:26 PM #13
Main problem nowadays is everything is so competitive that people lose sight of why you are playing the game in the first place. FUN!
All teens nowadays who play badminton just want to get good and be better then everyone else. Their perception seems to be that they are alot better than they actually are.
So cursing themselves and getting very frustrated is common in most teenagers i see nowadays. Thats 1 of the biggest things i try to teach my students whom i coach. The mental attitude of remaining positive at all times is so important.
Mistakes are fine as long as you learn from them appropriately. Kids just need to see the different side of things rather than "i have to be better then everyone else".
07-28-2009, 08:48 PM #14
It's the Tiger Woods syndrome.
For those who are golfers, you'll know the type of person I'm talking about. Just keep out of the way of those flying 5 irons!
I think sometimes, the aggressive manner in which teens react is planned to draw attention. Other reasons include embarrassment over a poor shot (although I bet you'd feel sheepish for your infantile behaviour when shaking hands later), higher expectation of themselves (common for players who are legends in their own minds but not in others') and reasons unknown.
This type of outburst tends to dissipate the enjoyment of the 3 remaining players and often results in heightened tension and lower quality play.
07-28-2009, 09:04 PM #15
It goes back to Anger Management that some of us do need
So... It goes back to Anger Management that some of us do need.
07-28-2009, 10:05 PM #16
easy said than done.
No one like to be that anger 'manager'
society culture conditioned us to 'pass the buck'
Last edited by cooler; 07-28-2009 at 10:09 PM.
08-04-2009, 08:25 AM #17
That kind of temper comes from within the player.
Frankly - as a coach - if I can't detect the temper inside a player, he/she is not of any interest to me.
The temper only has to be harnessed through "culture".
Harnessed "bad temper" becomes passion. You need passion to excel.
A player without passion or temper will never be able to fulfill his or her full potential.
So personally I would rather have players who from time to time "loose it", than players who look like they don't care if they win or lose.
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