coaching your GF

Discussion in 'Coaching Forum' started by a_d_y_a, Feb 9, 2006.

  1. a_d_y_a

    a_d_y_a Regular Member

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    Hi I have a weird problem. I am a pretty decent player. I like the game a lot. So my girlfriend decided to gift me by asking her to teach me how to play badminton. It was her gift to me, dunno how that works, but she has taken upon herself to learn badminton as I love it so much.

    As a decent player I had previously helped a lot of people with their game, colleagues, team mates, juniors etc. So I was very confident. So coaching begins.

    Day 1. All hell breaks loose. There is definite yellling, stubborness and a fight. Reasons unknown, taught nothing. Just disagreements over everything. I count that as my poor teaching abilities.

    Day 2. Better this time, still teaching her how to hit a toss cleanly. Just cant get through. Grip is wrong. She keeps changing. I keep getting worked up. Again my bad.

    Day 3. Tossing practice. No luck, no improvement, just much less disagreement. Hope!
    ..
    ..

    Day 7. No improvements so far. She cant still make a clean overhead hit. Grip is awkward. Body mechanics all wrong. She is getting angry at herself.

    So I need some help. I need to know what to teach her. I think partly because I have been playing for such a long time, I take everything for granted. I need some sort of hand book. Some sort of study plan. So I can break it down into tiny bits she can handle. She is a complete newbie at badminton and I am one at teaching.

    Help. Getting desperate. :(
     
  2. Chire

    Chire Regular Member

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    It's a really bad idea trying to teach any relavive or someone you know very well. They wouldn't listen, no matter how correct your technique/teachings are, they just argue just about everything. Generally, the coach has to have some authority over the player, was it formally or informally. The social part of the coaching is at least as important as the coaching technique-wise.

    The older you are (beginning from like the age of 13), the more difficult it is to learn new movements. They talk about this period when it's easiest to learn new technique, it's something like the ages of 8-14. Your GF might have passed that age already (judging from your age ;) ). After that, you need a lot of exercise to see progress. It's about 3000+ repetitions to learn to execute the movement properly, some even say it's well over 10000.

    As for me, I've tried teaching my brother and sister but it ended up with them both quitting badminton, even though my teachings are technique-wise perfect ( :D yeah that's me).
     
  3. Froca

    Froca Regular Member

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    agree with chire it really is a bad idea to teach someone u know and it's also a bad idea to ask someone u know to teach u( it's puts them in an akward position).

    if u really want to learn, learn from someone u don't noe. let's use a team coach as an ex. a good coach are always strict and yells at u but if u are connect to him/her this training is going to wreck ur releationship:p


    so some how kindly tell ur Gf that this isn't gonna work out , casue if u don't it's gonna get A LOT WORSE;)
     
  4. event

    event Regular Member

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    All the coaches in our area spent at least 6-10 years of their lives exclusively on badminton and then got trained as coaches by Lee Jae-bok himself. Despite these opportunities, my wife asked me to teach her myself. I feel extremely embarrassed about teaching in that kind of environment. Only a handful of people at my proficiency level have form that is even remotely as ugly as mine because they all started within the last 10 years and got their coaching from a professional and I was taught by a high school coach in rural Ontario. We tried it anyway and she complained that I didn't return her clears to exactly the same position every time so she wouldn't have to move to hit the shuttle. Lots of arguments and eye-rolling. She finally resigned to letting me pay for some lessons for her. Lee Jae-bok showed up the first day for a free clinic and introduced the local teacher, a former junior national team player. She started berating me for all the things I didn't (read: couldn't) teach her and basically my point was made for me. The most she asks me for now is help drilling.

    Your profile doesn't give a hint as to where you might be or what the professional coaching opportunities there might be.
     
  5. a_d_y_a

    a_d_y_a Regular Member

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    chire, she is well over the age of 14. :) But I dont think I have a choice as she thinks she is getting better. I completely understand that teaching movements at an older age is difficult. I completely understand that you need some authority over the person to teach them, which is absent when you are teaching ur GF. Things arguments wise are actually getting better. There are no coaches that I know of that will have time. We have tuff schedules and play at weird hours. Engineering Graduate students! But....


    I need to remove any flaws from my teaching stuff. You know I want to be sure that I am teaching her to the best of my abilities. I want to give it my best shot.


    Any more advice or a book, a drill set, website.
     
  6. OTFK

    OTFK Regular Member

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    Here is how I coach.
    Start with footwork, and then grip
    Then incorporate footwork with stroke (no shuttle)
    Then start with net shot (with shuttle)
    Then add footwork with net shot and shuttle
    Then repeat with net push
    then mid court net shot,
    mid court drive
    high clear (forehand)
    drop shot from baseline (forehand)
    smash from baseline (forehand)
    Now teaches the backhand baseline shots

    In my experience in North America, most will give up by Point #2.



     
  7. Viper2005

    Viper2005 Regular Member

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    You need to watch some Badminton Training DVDs yourself and then try teaching your girlfriend.

    Or watch it together and learn together, it will make her more comfortable.
    I may have the DVD you need, message me.
     
  8. Gollum

    Gollum Regular Member

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    I think you are being too hard on yourself.

    Part of being a coach is setting realistic expectations. As a player, you are frustrated that she can't "get it", when it seems so easy to you.

    You've only had a few sessions. Don't expect too much. How good were YOU after the same amount of experience?

    Of course, there's a lot more to coaching than just being able to play. Your girlfriend must recognise that you will not be able to teach her as effectively as a qualified coach.

    I don't agree that age is a problem. Granted, the optimal development programme for elite badminton players involves coaching from a very early age; but for less stratospheric levels of achievement, anyone can learn good technique.

    I also don't agree that the relationship factor is necessary a problem. I have had great success coaching my mum and dad with a very small number of sessions (this is also a counterexample to the age argument).
     
  9. SPaterson

    SPaterson Regular Member

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    Haven't read the entire thread, just initial post and skimmed, sorry, - too tired @ 12 o'clock. :p So I may well repeat what's already been said.

    Just a few tips if she Hasn't played badminton before, or even if she has.

    Firstly, don't get angry. Remember when you were once *new* to badminton, I know i SUCKED for a damn long time (3 years later some people may still argue I still do haha), people could even come in who hadn't played the game after I'd been playing 3 or so Months and they could beat me! I had no 'natural' talent for the game. Experience is important.

    Secondly, reassuring will help; just keep telling her she'll get better, it's all part of learning badminton, you can't just pick something up Straight away and be able to necessarily do even what are basic things in badminton.

    Thirdly, I find with those new to badminton are helped by hitting a shot STRAIGHT on. if they want to angle a shot to the side, move your Body to the side of the incoming shuttle, and hit STRAIGHT on, etc. with your arm Straight and moving the racquet down in a straight motion, not sweeping from the side.

    Fourthly, If you're teaching her something, and she makes mistakes and says "I forgot" or something like that, just tell her to Keep saying it over and over in her mind. I still do this myself regarding important footwork and it definately helps me!

    Fifthly, I'm off to bed.
     
  10. Quasimodo

    Quasimodo Regular Member

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    Coaching definitely requires skills that are quite different than playing. But, you've only coached her for 7 days. What sort of improvements did you expect she could make in 7 days?

    Just have fun. Smile. Laugh. Tease. Flirt. Whatever. She's your girlfriend. Take it slow and enjoy it. Enjoy the time you get to spend with someone whom you love. What could be better than that?
     
  11. alvinlai

    alvinlai Regular Member

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    Well for me, I tend to make the training more merrier~ Make jokes, squeal if you need to, make cute funny noises, celebrate with a nice hopping about if she did a nice shot. This works very well for me. No grumpiness, just pure fun and enjoyment. This works well with kids as well. I adopted this style when I was coaching taekwondo a few years back. My principle is, if they enjoy it, it makes it all the easier when they are happy.

    Don't concentrate to much on the grip on the first few times, let her run about a little bit and let her hit more high shots which are infront of her. Don't let her run front and back too much or give her those overhead shots. This is hard for beginers and she will be grumpy because she have to run and she can't hit them. She then blame it on you.

    My point is, stay happy and patient, make it easier for her and not too much criticism. I prefer constructive suggestions and explanations. Hope this helps. Good luck now~!
     
  12. alvinlai

    alvinlai Regular Member

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    Same ideology here, I agree 100%~!
     
  13. Iwan

    Iwan Regular Member

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    Hi adya, I don't really know what your situation is like, but here's my advice. If you know your theories, use it to convince her that you are right. If she's stubborn and tries to quarrel with you, just quietly look away and continue with the coaching the way she wants it to be. Women are very irrational sometimes, but they also have feelings. At the end of it, they'll probably feel a bit more guilty about it and make an effort to do what you said in order to please you ;) Oh, and never raise your voice :D Try to be the sweetest you can be :D At least that's how I coach children ;)
     
  14. ants

    ants Regular Member

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    If i'm not a coach. I would probably hire a coach to teach my partner. At least she cannot complaint and grumble to you.
     
  15. baddybabe

    baddybabe Regular Member

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    Eight years ago my boyfriend wanted to impress me with his badminton prowess so he invited me to go to practices with him. I was completely unfamiliar with the sport but became addicted immediately. He taught me some of the basics but our club never put much emphasis on drills, so I stayed at the same level for a long time.

    If there's a class or coaching she could sign up for, I think it would take a lot of stress off of both of you. Whatever happens, try to be as patient as possible during coaching and playing. From personal experience, I can say that yelling works with guys but it has a very negative effect on women.

    I'd recommend 1. mastering the grip, 2. working on lifts and drop shots (without running) 3. footwork and 4. clears and serving. Then practice some drills where she has to move around the court. If she stays with it then maybe include some strength training.

    Our club now has a dedicated coach and I can say this has made life easier for everyone. Everyone must follow the coaches orders and we work on drills as a group. I think most women prefer to do footwork, etc as a group. It's a little embarassing going at it solo.

    My boyfriend and I got married and now we play together in all kinds of tournaments. It's not easy and we're pretty much the only couple I know that plays together. We've had plenty of drama on the court but manage to work it out every time.
     
  16. smash_master

    smash_master Regular Member

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    hey hum just came across this and its interesting cause im starting to coach my GF...i dont know i have done it for a bit before and havnt had any negative feedback from her, she enjoyes it and were not going all out trying to learn everything at once...just taking it easy with one thing at a time and then just putting them all together and so far its been working good, i mean yeah sure we still have alot to work on but so far ive seen her improving and shes really enjoying it although she wants me to play her like actually play her in my top form cause she does want to see how she will do against me...shes not being cocky or anything she knows that she will probally not get a single point but she is just interested in seeing what its like to play against me haha oh well...wants to test out what she has learned agaist me you can say but ill see if ill do that to her yet or wait a while.
     
  17. a_d_y_a

    a_d_y_a Regular Member

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    wow

    Wow. So many replies. Thank you so much for your guidance.

    I have noticed the following with our experience so far.

    1. She wont play if I sign her up with another coach.
    2. More we play, more she listens to me on court. Off court is another story. :p I think it had to do more with her recognizing that I was correct atleast some times.
    3. I got her a book, which she grumpily skims, but the diagrams help her understand the game better.
    4. Enthusiasm has sky-rocketed since I bought her a cheap beginner racket and she doesnt have to rent one always.
    5. Footwork is amazingly difficult to teach.
    6. Wall Practice rocks! It has helped her a lot so far.
    7. Grip keeps changing.
    8. She has realized she can substitute a good hour of badminton training instead of an hour on the boring treadmill.


    Please keep the tips coming. They are fantastic!
     
  18. LazyBuddy

    LazyBuddy Regular Member

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    Not sure if this being metioned or not. You need to know what's her goal in order to know what "level" of skills you want to show her. Does she want to keep improving, to participate in serious games, or even tournies? Or, she simple consider this as social/work out, and just want a bit sweat and exercise?

    If #1, then, prepare for a long journy of hard work on both sides. Make sure everything you teach follow the correct sequence, and make sure the techniques are correct. If you are not sure, or having difficulty to let her understand, consult fellow coaches/experienced players.

    If #2, then, don't take too seriously. Give her a bit hint here and there might be way good enough. Let her to focus on the "fun" part, and don't over push for the game results. ;)
     
  19. stumblingfeet

    stumblingfeet Regular Member

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    Personally I think it is counter-beneficial to focus too much on using "correct" technique, especially when she's just beginning. Show her the basics, but put the emphasis on achieving certain goals, such as contacting the bird, then hitting it over the net, then past the service line, then past midcourt, etc..

    People can only concentrate on so many things when learning a new skill, and sometimes giving too much information at once just interferes with that concentration. Once she gets a feel for the shot, then you can slowly start giving some more specific instructions on how to hit the bird. For example, if she has trouble contacting the bird, what's the point of putting so much emphasis on the grip? Let her work at getting confident hitting the bird, then she'll be able to appreciate how much more powerful/easier it is to hit using the proper grip. This way, she won't feel bad for not getting the whole technique correct right at the beginning, which is frustrating.

    And remember, this is your girlfriend, so have fun. Just think of all the amusing ways to flirt with and have fun with her that you can't do with your normal students.
     
  20. LazyBuddy

    LazyBuddy Regular Member

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    I think I understand your point, however, I still believe start with the correct (not necessarily perfect though) technique is important, especially if she wants to be rather serious than just have fun. For your example, it depends. Wrong grip method might be the key factor why she can't even contact the shuttle.

    Well, it all depends. Having fun is the most important, but having fun with as much as correct information/instruction could only be a bonus. ;)
     

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