Game Affected by phobia.

Discussion in 'General Forum' started by Aphelion-, Jan 24, 2011.

  1. Aphelion-

    Aphelion- Regular Member

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    Hey, first time posting in the general forum, feeling kinda weird here.

    lets start with the topic, i have a weird phobia , is call haphophobia ( fear of being touch by stranger) , if by any chance, i am touch by some one that i don't know well, i will receive a shock and move away from him. If i am touched for a long period of time ( such as getting grab or hug ) by stranger, i will feel ill and wanted to vomit.

    This is where the problem start, as part of the respect, we have to clap hand with your opponent at the end of each set ( or even worst shake hand). after a clap of hand or a hand shake, i will feel disturbed for a little period of time, which will cause me to perform horribly till i feel better.

    so can anyone come up with some bright idea and save this poor little kid (me)
     
  2. cobalt

    cobalt Moderator

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    Welcome. Feeling kinda weird? We can fix that for you pretty soon! :D

    Why not just tell them the truth with a smile right when you introduce yourselves? Tell them its weird but true, and there's nothing you can do about it. Keep it short and sweet. If they can accept, thats great. If not, you know the people who are distrusting and who you are better off not interacting with.
     
    #2 cobalt, Jan 24, 2011
    Last edited: Jan 24, 2011
  3. visor

    visor Regular Member

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    if you're afraid of the germs from clapping or shaking, maybe you can use some alcohol gel afterwards to sterilize your hands afterwards?
     
  4. Fidget

    Fidget Regular Member

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    Visor gives the doctor's answer. But I like cobalt's idea. It works for Howie Mandel.:)

    Such a phobia is not that rare. But rather unfortunate for you, living in a double-cheek kiss place like Montreal.
    You may never become completely comfortable with contact, but there are psychological therapies for this. (Forget implications to career and love-life; if this problem is messing with your badminton, then you owe it to yourself to see what's possible!;)) Best of luck/Bonne chance.
     
  5. Aphelion-

    Aphelion- Regular Member

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    To Visor: is not that i am afraid of germ, is that i am afraid of skin to skin contact with any stranger, and if i have any skin to skin contact with stranger, it will disturb my concentration and feeling.

    to cobalt: life is not as easy as it seen lol, at tournament , many people use this as a advantage against me, is very disturbing, is there anyway that i can avoid the skin contact ? like if i can wear sumthing that can avoid direct skin contact?
     
  6. Aphelion-

    Aphelion- Regular Member

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    To Fidget : haha thanks for the blessing, but it wont really affect my career and my love life, i am only afraid of skin to skin contact, if i wear a glove or anything that intercept skin to skin contact, i am ok with it. then i will do this till i am really use to having that person around me :) .
     
  7. cobalt

    cobalt Moderator

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    Aphelion: there is no easy answer, is there? You just have to slug it out. You have a psychological disability that manifests itself even physically.

    You have to basically trust yourself and the fact that you will cope with whatever is thrown your way. Those who use your condition against you on court are mostly probably immature or a minority of them may be dysfunctional. I am sure you are smart enough to distinguish who is who.

    Or try this (I don't know how well it will work for you, but here's an idea. Don't bite me for it. :)) Before the game, spend more than a few seconds actually touching each player. No handshakes, just explain why you are doing it. Then touch him with your fingers, palms, clasp his forearm etc. Does he attack you? Does he spit on you or curse you? Is he trying to assault you in any physical, psychological way? No? Do you think you can trust being near his aura for the next half hour? Then smile, and play the game. Whatever happens, happens. At least your body and psyche now "knows" they are OK, because you initiated the contact, and no one bit you. :)

    Worse case? They'll probably think you're a wacko! :D But I dont think so.
     
  8. Aphelion-

    Aphelion- Regular Member

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    i will take your advice , but not to the level of touching, maybe i will find him and sit next to him, because if i start touching him or anything, i may feel ill before the match start xD, or worst, being call a wacko by everyone
     
  9. visor

    visor Regular Member

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    Or you could have a small handkerchief in your shorts that you can use to shield from hand to hand contact at the end of the match when you have to clap hands.
     
  10. cobalt

    cobalt Moderator

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    Of course, do remember to explain what the problem is. :) You'll be surprised how many people actually get around to be understanding. You have a "disability" and you are not a wacko. If anyone wants to label you as one publicly, you need to let that person know equally publicly, that you have a disability, and can he please take his prejudice somewhere else? :)
     
  11. Aphelion-

    Aphelion- Regular Member

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    to visor: if i use a handkerchief when i clap hands, wouldn't that also be a kind of disrespect?

    thanks for the advice everyone, i will call this a case close i guess.
     
  12. visor

    visor Regular Member

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    no disrespect, you could "pretend" to be wiping your face with it first, then just so "happen" to have it in your hand immediately afterwards when you have to touch

    people may think that's kinda weird, but it's easier than having to explain your phobia to every single person you have to touch
     
  13. Aphelion-

    Aphelion- Regular Member

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    i see, so i am gona start doing this every game, that is gona become my trade mark action lol

    anyway, real case close i guess.
     
  14. cobalt

    cobalt Moderator

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    Hope everything works out for you. :)
     
  15. Yuzo64

    Yuzo64 Regular Member

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    You could also just buy a glove and put it on your left hand, if you are right-handed. :)

    No harm to your feelings when playing, and you jut have to shake hands with your left at the end (even easier to do if you use your right hand to, say, hold a bottle of water or a shuttle tube)
     
  16. Gollum

    Gollum Regular Member

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    That's just what I was going to suggest.

    I like this solution because it avoids trying to fix the phobia on the badminton court. I don't like solutions that insist on curing the phobia, as this may be impossible, too unpleasant, or just take too long.
     
  17. Dreamzz

    Dreamzz Regular Member

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    a glove on your non-racquet hand is the best solution, if you are wearing it when you play then it doesn't look weird when you use it to slap someone else's hand after the match.
     
  18. visor

    visor Regular Member

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    ^^
    Although you know someone like me is going to wonder if you're trying to be Michael Jackson on the court. :p
     
  19. Andy05

    Andy05 Regular Member

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    I like the glove idea, make sure your right hand is either holding objects forcing them to shake lefty, or if you are left wear a glove on your right hand.
    Or honesty, that'll work.
     
  20. gingerphil79

    gingerphil79 Regular Member

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    Why dont u jus not touch them. Give them a head nod at the end of a match and say sorry just don't shake hands. eventually folk will know that u dont do it and thats it. Prob solved. If they ask, jus say I dont like skin to skin contact at all.

    I was jus thinking there, a clinical hypnotherapist may be able to help you. If anything am sure they can fix the prob very fast. Phobias are 1 of the easiest fixes i believe.
     

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