I've visited a couple different clubs but never really got that feeling like it was the right place for me. Maybe it's because it was my first time but even for ones that I visited 4+ times it was like that.
How do you define the right place? Not included much, too high level, no small talk/interest in you as a potential member and as person?
I played at a club where the people were friendly and were interested in me as a person. I was often included etc. but the enviroment was too low for my level. All people had fun, it was a nice and respectful enviroment, but for me it is important that around 50% of the players are stronger than me, so I get a lot of different opponents.
I played at a club where everybody attend to have decent matches, after beeing tired everybody left at a different time. The communication was mostly badminton related, next games etc. The matches were decent. I discovered that it is to me more important to have decent games, instead of making friends for life.
The main reason I felt that way was because no one tried to talk to me during breaks or give tips while playing.
Personally I avoid to give foreign people tips or advice. If somebody asks something I know there is some interest, if not I don't start to correct somebody I don't know. I can't judge if somebody want this to hear or not, so I try not to disturb somebody.
They had their own friends in the club and just went onto the court to play and then left again when the bell rang. If I feel uncomfortable/awkward with the people I play with, then I end up playing worse.
It's difficult for a single person to get into of circle of people who know each other for long time. I recommend to wait until you and somebody else sit seperate on the bench. Go over and introduce yourself. You will get fast into small talk and have somebody whose name you know and talked to. To slide into a group sitting together is difficult.
Accept that you are in a new enviroment full of foreign people. Nobody will play at his peak, when he is a bit nervous and need adjustments to the enviroment during play, beside the pressure to make a good impression to foreign people and nothing wrong.
Plus one of the reasons I want to join a club is so I can get advice from better players otherwise I might as well play with the same set of friends
If you want advices you need to ask better players. No better player will badger weaker players with advices. You need to ask for and specific. Start with a compliment. E.g. "Hey, I have seen your dropshot is so sharp, I wish I could do it, too. Have you a hint for me what I can make better?" Nobody will refuse you, especially a female.
You should look for a club with training instead of just playing. You get partnered inside a team of 2 or 3 people and do the drills together. This will break the ice. You need to communicate in a small group/ 1 on 1 for the drills and get the advice from a coach you are looking for.
Obviously location, time, and cost is important. How do you decide that a club is right for you? How long should I play in a club before I make a judgement?
If you can drive the location become less important and give you a larger pool of potential clubs. I would travel for good games with decent players in a good enviroment instead of playing shitty stuff beside my house.
I wouldn't just look at the costs. My club is the most expensive in my area. Beside that I can buy shuttles there at a good discount, play in a very modern hall and have the option to play 4 times per week. Our hall is open during holidays and we have enough courts to get many play out of a date. We have training once a week by two coaches. That this package is more expensive on the first look than buying shuttles at full price, no coach (who needs to get paid), and having a small number of courts, so you need to wait often and long and go home with less court time is a no-brainer.
Beside that it is important to find a club where you fit into the middle. If you are better than a huge number of players, you will get bored easily, some will refuse to play you and you don't improve much. Same goes if you are weaker than a huge number of players. You won't included much, because you don't challenge them. Sitting somewhere in the middle is mostly the most comfortable spot to get included.
