The obsessive badminton player and his unhappy girlfriend, help!!

[Cheung]

If it's a must i say quit badminton, or play once in a while whenever she can't be around you. Of course, if she is actually THE ONE.
Long term is more important than short term. Married will be 50? 60 years?
Badminton, if you play hard core do your very best everytime, body break down, slowly play a little less agreesive... i'll say 10-15 years.
And when you hit that age where both of you're knees are destroyed by moving around too quick in the court. my white friend always said "XIN LOI" (in english sorry)

Disagree. She cannot be THE ONE is she asks to compromise THE PASSIONNATE GAME.

I agree with the earlier point...girls generally try to change the guy. That's not good. Women generally try to control the guy. See danielwong's comment if you don't believe me!!

Back to iceling's comment of "you can try to compromise...". This is totally the wrong tactic and I strongly advise you not to follow this advice. Why? Because the girl will ask for more and more and more as a way of seeing how much control she can get over you.

I think you should show her you cannot be manipulated so easily. IF she cannot compromise, the relationship is in fact, not compatible and had not been so from the start. Once you try to start playing more badminton again, she'll argue "but it wasn't like this before..."

 

[ryim_]

I'm glad as my girlfriend likes to play badminton and does not mind me playing at all. She actually asks me to play more than I ask her to and I'm teaching her now.

Back to the OP's situation, if it happened to me, I would seriously think about my relationship with this girl since badminton is something healthy and positive. I don't see this as a problem unless you play 24/7

 

[ants]

Get a person who likes to do the same thing that you do. Yes.. women likes to control and change a man.. vice versa. Decide on a resolution.. not a compromise.

 

[JustinG]

How often did you say you play? (per week)
I play 3 times a week but I'm smart about it, I just don't play and leave my g'f at home, I make sure she is busy with friends, family, or shopping .

If you want to get to the bottom of this, ask her this simple question: why do you want me to play less badminton?
If she says, "So we can spend more time together."
Then you better spend more time with her, or else your relationship will suffer. At the same time, explain to her in a calm manner, your love for the game and that it is part of your life.

She will understand, just try to strike a better balance; unless she is one of those women that no matter how much time you spend with them, they always claim it's not enough....lol...then you're screwed.haha! j/k

Good luck, be reasonable and understanding.

 

[Fidget]

Pretty much everything has been covered. Just let me ask you this:

When you are away from the court and spending time with your girlfriend are you truly "away from the court"? Or do you talk about your games; complain about injuries; leave smelly socks all over; re-grip rackets while watching a movie, etc...?

If she is a great gal and worth the effort, then make her time her time. Do as Otis Redding sang and 'try a little tenderness'. It might just do wonders.

 

[cooler]

does she play other sports? it is hard to dislike badminton if one is at least interested in some kind of sports. If she doesnt play sports, watch out. After u marry her, her weight will balloon up

 

[kwun]

But women will always be women...i am married and only play badminton
one day per week...the only day I play is sunday and 3 hours...but she still complain....request me to play 2 hours enough....

my wife plays more badminton than me. i guess i did pretty well.

 

[flyingfox]

from my experience, guy would follow whatever his girl did, wherever his girl went, that's before married. After married, girl would have no choice other than gave in to the hubby/kid/family :crying:

meaning, try to listen to her first, marry her, then future will be yours ..

 

[chris-ccc]

Good advise from a female BCer

from my experience, guy would follow whatever his girl did, wherever his girl went, that's before married. After married, girl would have no choice other than gave in to the hubby/kid/family :crying:

meaning, try to listen to her first, marry her, then future will be yours ..

.
flyingfox...... Good advise from you, as our female BCer.

Only wish that this thread was titled:
The obsessive Badminton player with his HAPPY girlfriend.
.

 

[kwun]

from my experience, guy would follow whatever his girl did, wherever his girl went, that's before married. After married, girl would have no choice other than gave in to the hubby/kid/family :crying:

meaning, try to listen to her first, marry her, then future will be yours ..

not neccessarily true all the time.

i have many badminton buddies who dramatically cut down badminton because the wife don't allow.

 

[danielwong]

from my experience, guy would follow whatever his girl did, wherever his girl went, that's before married. After married, girl would have no choice other than gave in to the hubby/kid/family :crying:

meaning, try to listen to her first, marry her, then future will be yours ..

pretty much wrong...
before married, she cannot control me, i play 3 times per week...
after married she only allow 1 day per week, but still complain on the hours
spent.....:crying::crying:

not neccessarily true all the time.

i have many badminton buddies who dramatically cut down badminton because the wife don't allow.

thats me.....:crying::crying::crying:

 

[george@chongwei]

pretty much wrong...
before married, she cannot control me, i play 3 times per week...
after married she only allow 1 day per week, but still complain on the hours
spent.....:crying::crying:





thats me.....:crying::crying::crying:

But the main thing is she's still happy right?

just complain only..normal la for women

 

[Pemuda]

Time to change girlfriend.

Yup, thats right, dude.

From my limited experience, its a big ocean out there with all kinds of fish.

Anyway, I broke up with my last girlfriend early last year. I am single now, and loving every minute of it. Its freedom, man. I dont have to think about anything. I get to do anything I want. Go anywhere I want. And yes, date anyone I fancy.

 

[Pemuda]

pretty much wrong...
before married, she cannot control me, i play 3 times per week...
after married she only allow 1 day per week, but still complain on the hours
spent.....:crying::crying:

Bro, thats the problem with women. I mean you are a pretty good husband. You dont go clubbing or chasing skirts all over town. You are playing badminton ... a totally healthy activity.

Women must understand us men more. We are like wild lions. We cant be kept in some zoo. We need to be out there in the wild doing our thing.

 

[danielwong]

Yup, thats right, dude.

From my limited experience, its a big ocean out there with all kinds of fish.

Anyway, I broke up with my last girlfriend early last year. I am single now, and loving every minute of it. Its freedom, man. I dont have to think about anything. I get to do anything I want. Go anywhere I want. And yes, date anyone I fancy.

YESTERDAY ONCE MORE :crying::crying:

Bro, thats the problem with women. I mean you are a pretty good husband. You dont go clubbing or chasing skirts all over town. You are playing badminton ... a totally healthy activity.

Women must understand us men more. We are like wild lions. We cant be kept in some zoo. We need to be out there in the wild doing our thing.

i not only like playing badminton, i like to collect badminton shirts and rackets
as well....cant be hidding my newly bought rackets inside my car boot forever.....:crying::crying::crying:
yes, we are lion.....beside badminton, we need to do other wild thing as well.....

 

[ctjcad]

My 3 "be"s..

..for gingerphil79:
- Be grateful you're not married.
- Be ready to be hustled, hassled, bustled or even get an earful if you want to have a gf. Otherwise, if you want to do your own thing and not be hustled, hassled, bustled and get an earful, then stay single.
- Be a man, do the right thing!.......http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-qtrAMK7_Qk

 

[Cheung]

from my experience, guy would follow whatever his girl did, wherever his girl went, that's before married. After married, girl would have no choice other than gave in to the hubby/kid/family :crying:

meaning, try to listen to her first, marry her, then future will be yours ..

Which planet did you come from?

Or, you must be the mischeivous type who is playing with the OP.

not neccessarily true all the time.

i have many badminton buddies who dramatically cut down badminton because the wife don't allow.

I'm another(

But the main thing is she's still happy right?

just complain only..normal la for women

No, these things eat away at the very fabric of a person's soul. Why do you have to settle for 'normal'? Try to find something better!!!

 

[george@chongwei]

Try influence her about badminton 1st before u marry her

 

[eaglehelang]

Get a person who likes to do the same thing that you do. Yes.. women likes to control and change a man.. vice versa. Decide on a resolution.. not a compromise.

Haha, yup, same goes the other way round if he's not a badminton fan.

pretty much wrong...
before married, she cannot control me, i play 3 times per week...
after married she only allow 1 day per week, but still complain on the hours
spent.....:crying::crying:

Well, look at it this way, does she have to give up a lot of her own hobbies after the baby came along? Some ladies dont "allow" cos they themselves are stuck with childcare & have to give up doing a lot of things they love doing. While husband can do like bachelor days, so, they think, "I have to sacrifice so much, he just enjoy, not fair".
All this still happen in this modern times, this is not old example.

And most ladies I know no such thing as 'wife dont allow', usually what wife says no effect. It's usually 'husband dont allow' more so.
Also same case, before married, all ok, all can tolerate, after marriage, many things husband not allow them to do.

 

[eaglehelang]

Oops, almost forgot about the thread starter. Hmmm, like this, consider how much you like badminton, if you can live without her or without badminton.
Try a find a gf who's interested in some sort of sports, be interested in her sports. Or hehehe, find some badminton fan here in BC, then both of you can go training together (ur gf will hate me for this).